Finger Food

Conversation between Miami County health investigator and the Arby's manager who misplaced his 3/4" strip of fingerprint in the shredded lettuce:

HEALTH INVESTIGATOR: Sir, we have a report that a man bit into his Arby's sandwich and found a piece of flesh.

RESTAURANT MANAGER:  I can guarantee you that there was no flesh in that Arby's sandwich.

HI:  Then why are you hiding your hand behind your back?

RM:  Oh, it's nothing, really, just a little cut--

HI:  And why have you got a bandage on your finger?

RM:  Just a little nick, it's nothing, really--

HI:  And why do you have a latex glove on?!

RM:  You know, cleanliness is next to godliness I always say--

HI:  A-HA!  You DID cut your finger!

RM:  Yes sir, but I sanitized the area!  And I immediately threw away the product in and around the slicer!

HI:  Then how did your skin wind up in that guy's chicken sandwich?

RM:  Um--

HI:  Are you going to try to tell me that that's not your real hand?
Fess up, buster!

RM:  I'm not saying anything else!  I know my rights!  I'm not talking til I have a vice president of marketing and communications present!