To the pyromaniac choads in my 'hood

photo by atomicity on flickr, CC licensed

To the pyromaniac choads in my 'hood,

Happy Independence Day!  Look, I know this is the one time of year you get to pop a chubby coaxing a scream out of a flaming stick.  But do you have to light up the fireworks every night for the two weeks leading up to July 4?  Isn't one night of keeping grandma up with your deafening, gunshot-like noises enough for you?  Let me remind you that it is ILLEGAL to set off any fireworks in New York without a permit.

You know what else is illegal?  Putting a night-vision scope on a rhino tranquilizer rifle and sniping people who insist on interrupting their sleeping neighbors.

I'm just sayin',
Crabby