Part of me of course misses my friends and the comforts of home. And part of me is already nostalgic for my time here, my little pseudo-European life. I am sitting around being bored and lonely, shopping to fill my time, not feeling that I can lean on the tendril roots of my new friendships. I am also home on "Easter Monday", riding my bicycle around the islands of Stockholm, reading books and drinking hot coffee, re-teaching myself to cook. It's lonely and it's lovely, all the time and at the same time.
Spring has arrived in Stockholm. The gigantic tree in the courtyard, the only one that can peek into my attic apartment, is really starting to bud up. I have been waiting for this moment for months. Now that it's here, I'm reluctant to rejoice. This is what I have been waiting for. Well, now what?
Two months I've been here. Only two months, and yet already 1/3 of the way through my job. Sometimes I feel like I have made no progress. When it comes to the language, when I'm feeling tired and lonely (which is often), I speak English for everyday interactions. My Swedish is not 1/3 of the way towards basic communication.
And yet I can understand a lot. The signs are no longer just fun exercises in pronunciation. Kemtvätt, hembageri, ingen reklam tack, stängd, ej kod. These things, which are so common to me now, would have been nothing to me just two months ago.
For the last two weeks, I tried to verb it. Must enjoy! Must socialize! Must stop kvetching! I think this week, I'm going to lay back in the cut a bit, maybe plan some more weekend trips, do a little more yoga. I'm hoping that not trying so hard to enjoy myself will translate into a marked increase in actual enjoyment. It is not my usual New Yorker/Asian-American overachiever way, but it is a way I ought to learn.
Spring has arrived in Stockholm. The gigantic tree in the courtyard, the only one that can peek into my attic apartment, is really starting to bud up. I have been waiting for this moment for months. Now that it's here, I'm reluctant to rejoice. This is what I have been waiting for. Well, now what?
Two months I've been here. Only two months, and yet already 1/3 of the way through my job. Sometimes I feel like I have made no progress. When it comes to the language, when I'm feeling tired and lonely (which is often), I speak English for everyday interactions. My Swedish is not 1/3 of the way towards basic communication.
And yet I can understand a lot. The signs are no longer just fun exercises in pronunciation. Kemtvätt, hembageri, ingen reklam tack, stängd, ej kod. These things, which are so common to me now, would have been nothing to me just two months ago.
For the last two weeks, I tried to verb it. Must enjoy! Must socialize! Must stop kvetching! I think this week, I'm going to lay back in the cut a bit, maybe plan some more weekend trips, do a little more yoga. I'm hoping that not trying so hard to enjoy myself will translate into a marked increase in actual enjoyment. It is not my usual New Yorker/Asian-American overachiever way, but it is a way I ought to learn.
I think that's a good idea. WILIP (when I lived in Paris) I'd have those weeks where it was too exhausing ("it" being the whole living of life in another tongue). But the week after I'd have jumped a level of language and acculturation. I'd drop some slangy term that had been incomprenhensible a week before.
Speaking of which, I'll email you the Paris lists. xo