I'm about to go on vacation! There, I said it. One week, possibly two weeks without my computer. That means I'm dropping a cover over this site and I'll be back in a week or two. I will bring the iPhone so I can use the map function (and possibly Twitter), but that's it! It'll be me, my bicycle, a Swedish island in the Baltic Sea called Gotland, and the crazy spiral of my mind which I will attempt to hypnotize with physical activity. It might rain, a lot, but I'm trying to nut up about it.
It's early August in Sweden and that means everyone has been on vacation for the last few weeks. I get tons of auto-replies that say, "Jag är på semester" ("I am on vacation"). I even received one auto-reply with the subject "Paraplydrinkar" ("Umbrella drinks")!
You American readers know, of course, that it is practically verboten for an American to actually admit in their auto-reply that we are on vacation. Instead, we say something purposefully vague like, "I am out of the office until August 3" or even "I am working out of the office".
Whenever I tell a Swede that we would never dare say that we're on vacation, they ogle the crazy on my face and ask, "But why?" And I don't know why. Why are we Americans so ashamed of vacation? Would it be such a terrible thing to admit that we are taking time off from work? I would like to propose a few different auto-replies for your next non-work period.
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Subject: No deadbeat dad
Hi! Thanks for your e-mail.
I am taking five days to play catch with my son who thinks that I live at work.
Do you remember what your dad looks like?
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Subject: Moo!
I will be gone for the next three weeks so I don't have to pump breast milk in the bathroom on my lunch break.
Between breastfeeding my child and continuing my career, I choose both. What do you think of that?
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Subject: I work hard so they don't have to
I will be in California for a week visiting my parents, whom I get to see once a year. I will read your e-mail on the five-hour red-eye flight home.
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Subject: Couples therapy
Thank you for getting in touch.
I am at home this week reconnecting with my workaholic wife, but I am clearing out my inbox once a day so I don't have to go through 1500 emails when I am back in the office.
When I come back, the world will still be turning, I promise.
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Subject: Umbrella drinks!
I am sitting on a beach with an umbrella drink in hand. Don't be mad at me. You will be on vacation soon, too. Then you can rub it in my face. And we can all have a good laugh about how nice it is to not have to pretend that the only thing we care about in life is work.
Cheers!
Ganda
I'm Australian, and we tend to write the same non-committal out-of-office autoreplies. I was thinking maybe it's because I don't know who is going to email me, and whether I really want them to know what I'm doing. Surely "I'm not going to answer your email for 2 weeks" is enough? Those who do need to know, probably already do. But I'll try "Paraplydrinkar" next time! Maybe if Outlook called it "Vacation message" instead of "out of office"?
Hi Ganda,
Have a wonderful vacation! I just wanted to say I am so glad I've stumbled upon your blog. I really really enjoy it. I just returned to the states after 7 months in Denmark and it is so nice to read about your experiences. You are making me want to go back to that part of the world ASAP!
Take Care and I look forward to your future posts! :-)
Stephanie
Hilarious post! Hope you're having a great vacation!
It is pathological to value work over vacation. Period.
I am not talking about those who are on perpetual vacation...that is also pathological unless one is reputably retired.
Sometimes I just wish that the old church calendar prevailed...1/2 the year consisted of feast days....and that meant food and lots of drink!
We forget to enjoy our lives and that is a sin. There is NO virtue in placing our work above our family/children.
Bring back vacations! Also, lobby for a 32 hour work week! Earn less, live on less!