Category: Gnews

I'm a little behind, but I just started poking around the T Style Food Issue.  I told my friend Mike I was going to watch what I say, but come on, what the fuck is going on over there?  A story written by a self-proclaimed picky eater in L.A. who doesn't eat bananas, avocados, lamb, or dill?  Cod cheeks as the "new staple"?  A $950 basket backpack as a "dining must-have"?  A writer who has to call the Cherry Marketing Institute in Michigan to figure out that you can buy frozen cherries at the supermarket? 

Reading the Times' Dining section these days is like watching Rosie O'Donnell spilling out of her orange t-shirt and long shorts while playing Andie McDowell's candy-snorting retarded sister in a Hallmark movie.  It's horrifying on so many levels, but I'm compelled by its Medusa-like spell to watch and wither away. 

A great salt taste test over at Salon (link via Liao Yusheng).  I am a big fan of the Maldon, Fleur de Sel and Japanese/Korean moist sea salts.  And Diamond Kosher, which I first learned to use while living with my dear friend Julie.  Of course, Jeffrey Steingarten's salt taste test (which I think is in It Must've Been Something I Ate) predates this one, but both are great reads. 

Interesting note: Jeffrey Steingarten has talked about the lawyer-gourmand, placing himself in the company of the revered Brillat-Savarin among others.  But here are some fun facts for you: the byline says that Dan Crane, the author of this salt article, is a "musician and writer."  Jim Leff, Chowhound founder, is a former downtown trombonist.   Robert Sietsema, restaurant critic for the Village Voice,  was bassist in a band called Mofungo when he started his food zine, Down the Hatch.  I was once backing vocalist for the two lovely and talented gourmets of Cibo Matto (Italian for "food crazy"), whose first album consisted entirely of food metaphor songs.  I posit that musicians also make great gourmands, but I'm too sleepy to theorize about the reasons.  Can you tell me why the fat lady sings?

The Center for Consumer Freedom (and freedom fries for all!), a group backed by anonymous fast food bigwigs, takes out $600,000 in newspaper ads dismissing concerns over obesity.  Possible slogan:  Obesity -- It's No Big Thing! 

The Center for Consumer Freedom's next ad campaign, with backing from nuclear waste management bigwigs, dismisses concerns over groundwater contamination.  Possible slogan:  Hey, As Long As It's Not Your Baby, What Do You Care?

In case you didn't come here via Bazima, super hot Blaise K (she of the sharp cheekbones and sharper wit) has interviewed me for her "7 minutes in heaven" series.  I kind of look like a serial killer in the picture because I have not yet mastered the art of the self-portrait.  Or maybe I just look like a serial killer.  Anyway, I'm a huge Bazima fan.  You should love your Bazima too. 

P.S.  Just to clarify, I was a live performance backing vocalist for Miho and Yuka, the dynamic duo that is Cibo Matto.  I'm not Miho or Yuka, both of whom are friends and great fun to eat with. 

Conversation between Miami County health investigator and the Arby's manager who misplaced his 3/4" strip of fingerprint in the shredded lettuce:

HEALTH INVESTIGATOR: Sir, we have a report that a man bit into his Arby's sandwich and found a piece of flesh.

RESTAURANT MANAGER:  I can guarantee you that there was no flesh in that Arby's sandwich.

HI:  Then why are you hiding your hand behind your back?

RM:  Oh, it's nothing, really, just a little cut--

HI:  And why have you got a bandage on your finger?

RM:  Just a little nick, it's nothing, really--

HI:  And why do you have a latex glove on?!

RM:  You know, cleanliness is next to godliness I always say--

HI:  A-HA!  You DID cut your finger!

RM:  Yes sir, but I sanitized the area!  And I immediately threw away the product in and around the slicer!

HI:  Then how did your skin wind up in that guy's chicken sandwich?

RM:  Um--

HI:  Are you going to try to tell me that that's not your real hand?
Fess up, buster!

RM:  I'm not saying anything else!  I know my rights!  I'm not talking til I have a vice president of marketing and communications present!

This is a completely fascinating breakdown of the strawberry industry from California Mariquita Farmer Andy Griffin.  Check out his articles on everything from wild boars to watermelon radishes to John Steinbeck.  My new favorite read. 

**via Saute Wednesday.

Regina Schrambling has an excellent article on green almonds in the L.A. Times today.  They've got them at Fairway right now.  I saw them the other day and was fascinated.  The NYT article they had posted said you could eat them whole, fuzzy hull and all, but Schrambling says it's best to peel them.  I trust in Gastropoda.

I love a feel-good story, and this Times feature on the Cakeman Raven is great.  I must go pay him a visit.  Has anyone tried his red velvet?  It doesn't look as cocoa-y as Sugar Sweet Sunshine's.  In fact, there's only one teaspoon of cocoa.  And he uses cream cheese frosting as opposed to satin buttercream -- I love me some cream cheese frosting. 

Lucy's Greenmarket Report says ramps have arrived at the Greenmarket.  My friend Julie says they're pretty small this week, but they should be bigger by next week.  Rick the potato farmer is selling them for $2.50/sizeable bunch.  Hopefully the fiddleheads will also show up on Saturday. 

A really good piece of gossip on Gastropoda today:

I didn’t coin this, but “butt-girl for Eli” has a nice ring to it. Especially since inquiring competitors are gossiping that all that tame salmon actually came from the same distributor. I'm sure it's a spurious claim, but it does make you wonder why a cheese shop that hasn’t bought a certain blue for two years is making a fuss about listeria (among myriad unanswered questions). One more and it’s a trend: stories with holes big enough to drive a raw milk tanker-truck through.

And in case you don't feel like hunting down those articles, Auntie Ganda does the work for you:

The wild salmon article ($)

The cheese article